| James Morisette. 25th November, 2005 - 3:53 pm
 Dear Mr. Ford,
I am writing to tell you how appropriate it was that your Detroit Lions wore black uniforms to their own funeral against the Atlanta Falcons yesterday. Your leadership’s atrocious ability to prepare its players for gridiron warfare, to call common sense plays, and to show intestinal fortitude has certainly earned them the right to feast on unemployment in the NFL. After watching the Lions get demolished on their home turf for the second year in a row, I wonder how much longer you will be able to uphold your undying loyalty towards the ensemble of mediocrity called Mariucci, Tollner, and Jauron.
Sir, Head Coach Steve Mariucci is the Flip Saunders of professional football, meaning he is a players/veterans coach. Mariucci fit perfectly into the San Francisco 49ers system because the team was composed mostly of battle-tested veterans. The Lions on the other hand are a team composed of highly talented but youthful, undisciplined, and inexperienced men. You have given Mariucci nearly three years to transform these young men into champions but he has failed.
During his tenure as head coach, Mariucci has compiled an overall record of 15 victories and 28 defeats. While this is much better than what Marty Morningwheg was able to accomplish as head coach of your team, Mariucci’s record, especially when having so much raw talent at nearly every position, is not acceptable. Thus, it may be time for you to relieve Mariucci of his post as Commander of Lion Forces and hire a Larry Brown type coach; a stern but respectful general who possesses the ability to teach these young men the importance of perfecting the fundamentals of professional football, and to acquire battle-tested veterans that will help the Lions succeed.
Sir, Offensive Coordinator Ted Tollner, who may be the most offensively close-minded mortal in football, should also begin finding employment elsewhere. For the second time in as many weeks, he chose to abandon running the football early in the game. Throughout the season, Tollner has abandoned successful running back Kevin Jones in order to unsuccessfully utilize his other two running backs, Shawn Bryson and Artose Pinner. For example, Jones ran the ball early and often against the Falcons with much success (4 carries/32 yards/8.0 yards per carry). But Tollner, in all his ignorance, starved his hungry sophomore phenom in favor of Bryson and Pinner. If you do not recall, Bryson was the one who lost five yards on a screen play early in the first quarter and then fumbled the ball away to the Falcons.
The Lions receiving corps, minus Scotty Vines, has also failed to live up to its potential under Tollner’s watch. Early in the year, Williams, Williams, Pollard, Rogers, and Johnson were deemed the most feared wide receiver corps in the NFL. To this point in history however, they have failed miserably. Roy Williams early first quarter tumble and subsequent Falcon interception by DeAngelo Hall; Marcus Pollard’s two dropped passes; and Mike William’s incorrect execution of his passing route leading to another Falcon interception; epitomized receiving ineptitude. Aside from Kevin Johnson and Marcus Pollard, these young men have no discipline. They have no character. They do not run routes appropriately. They drop passes that hit them in the chest. They earn a twenty yard first down but then have the football stripped away from their muscle-bound arms. They are the reason defenses put eight men in the box to stop the run. And, for both our blood pressure’s sake, it is essential we not discuss the quarterback/offensive line situation, for it is simply too root-canal painful to discuss.
The bottom line is that Tollner must go. The Lions have multiple weapons that must be utilized appropriately. They are a dynamic group of athletes who are used to making big plays, not catching five yard hooks. The Lions need an open minded offensive coordinator who will push the limits of offense, who will not be afraid to make mistakes, and who will add balance to the time of possession so the defense can earn a breather. And Tollner needs to be replaced quickly sir before these players leave your franchise in the dust and become successful players for other NFL teams.
Finally sir, Dick Jauron should definitely be spared from the wrath of NFL employment. If it were not for the Lion’s defense, the Lions would be 0-11 instead of 4-7. It was warriors like Dre’ Bly, Dan Wilkinson, R.W. McQuarters, and Boss Bailey who found a way to keep the Lions in numerous football games only to watch Tollner and his feeble offensive unit sputter quickly. As a result, Jauron and Company found itself on the field for the majority its games and subsequently lost many key players due to injury. For example, the Falcons held a 14:20 – 5:09 advantage in time of possession at the 10:31 mark of the second quarter yesterday. When a defensive unit is the field this long and fatigue sets in strange things will happen. For example, late in the first quarter, Algae Crumpler caught a short pass two yards short of the first down and was held up by R.W. McQuarters. But then all of a sudden, when the play appeared to be deceased, Boss Bailey came roaring in from the Falcons backfield and, in an attempt to tackle Crumpler, pushed him four yards forward for a first down. Then during that same Atlanta march, the Lions defense accomplished two penalties in a row, both of which occurred inside the 10 yard line. These penalties not only helped the Falcons earn a free first down, but they also set up T.J. Duckett’s one yard touchdown plunge. Then, shortly after Shawn Bryson fumbled, the huffing and puffing defense trudged right back onto the field. At that point it did not matter who the Falcons handed the ball off to. They could have handed the ball off to Stevie Wonder or Elton John and they would have run the ball well against the terribly tired Lion defense.
Mr. Ford, you have many difficult decisions to make in the next few hours/days. You have a franchise filled to the brim with unprecedented talent but, at this time in history, you have no fundamentally sound coaches possessing the ability to tap into it. Selecting coaches who possess the ability reach these young men will not be easy. But it is utterly important that both you and Mr. Millen find some quickly before the talent leaves the organization once again, and the organization suffers miserably for another decade. P.S. If you have trouble figuring out what steps need to be taken to turn the Lion’s around, perhaps you could call the Pistons front office and ask for Joe Dumars.
Very Respectfully,
James M. Morisette |
