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Rules Of Thumb For Week 1
Authored by Jeff Risdon - 8th September, 2008 - 10:40 pm
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Thumbs Up

- To the rookie QB's, Joe Flacco and Matt Ryan. One of the TV networks flashed a graphic that only nine rookie QB's won the season opening start since 1973. Add two more to that list. Flacco earned the Ravens a win with an improbable 38-yard TD scamper and outdueled Carson Palmer in a display of offensive impotence. Coach Jon Harbaugh (also notching a win in his first game) asked Flacco to not blow the game for the absolutely smothering defense, and Flacco delivered.

Ryan only had to throw 13 passes, but his first was a memorable one, a 62-yard TD to Michael Jenkins on a play where Ryan tricked the safety with his eyes and hit Jenkins in stride as he streaked past the hoodwinked Lions' D. Coach Mike Smith, yet another rookie debut winner, called a great game to keep Ryan confident, riding Michael Turner and Jerrious Norwood as they carved the inept Lions' run defense for over 300 yards.

- To Roscoe Parrish, the Bills' electrifying wideout and punt returner. I watched the early slate of Sunday?s games at a sports bar where every game was on at least one TV. With the three televisions on the same wall all on commercial, attention focused on the Bills/Seahawks' battle in the driving rain just in time for some real magic. Parrish fielded a punt and made two awe-inspiring cuts on his way to the end zone. For a minor game that very few were paying any mind before that, Parrish got the entire bar to audibly go ?Wow, did you see that?!?? The final cut by Parrish came straight from a video game where you enter a secret code to get extra acceleration and agility, not at all human. You might not see a more fantastic run all season even though about 30 minutes later Reggie Bush elicited much the same response with his open field prowess against the Bucs.

Thumbs Down
- To the hypesters of the Houston Texans and Cleveland Browns. Both teams are trendy picks to make playoff runs in 2008, but if opening week means anything those two are much closer to the #1 overall draft pick than the playoffs. Houston fell behind 35-3 to a Pittsburgh team that didn?t really look like they were trying all that hard before rallying for a couple of late scores when the Steelers were just trying to not get hurt. The Texans O-line, supposedly a rebuilt strength, was brutalized by Dick Lebeau?s defense. Houston?s pass defense, long a bugaboo, isn?t any better, allowing Ben Roethlisberger to complete 13 of 14 passes for 152 yards and 2 TD's. Other than Mario Williams efforting 2 sacks, there was no pass rush, a real problem when your CB's can?t cover anyone.

The Browns were expected to have a high-powered, versatile offense keyed by the best OL in football. Against an admittedly strong Dallas D, they managed just 10 first downs as QB Derek Anderson looked very much like the guy who couldn?t beat out Charlie Frye in the summer of 07. We all expected the Cleveland D to struggle, and they fulfilled those expectations as Tony Romo & Co. marched all over the field. I told anyone who would listen the Texans were not legit, but I have to admit I drank a little of the Browns' Kool Aid. Give me a ?thumbs twiddling? on that one.

- To anyone who reads too much into Week 1 results. Week 1 is the most unpredictable week every season, and quite often teams that have high expectations with loads of returning veteran starters will start a little slow. The Colts and Seahawks sure fit that bill Sunday. It?s only human nature to want to get your hopes up if you?re a Falcons' or Bears' fan, but if you?re going to survive the long season mentally intact you need to not get too high. Remember the Panthers of 2001, beating a Vikings' team coming off an 11-5 season in the opener. Those Panthers didn?t win another game. Likewise, it?s premature to hit the panic button in Jacksonville, Seattle, and Washington. Keep that thumb close to the button in DC, though...

Thumbs Twiddling
- For the New England Patriots, who got the very definition of a Phyrric victory. In holding on for dear life and getting some help from an apparently blind back judge, the Patriots squeaked out a win over the downtrodden Chiefs. But the result of this game is an afterthought,because Golden God Tom Brady suffered a nasty knee injury that will apparently wipe out the rest of his season. You simply don?t replace a QB coming off the greatest passing season ever, but I was impressed with the performance of little-used backup Matt Cassel. Thirteen-for-18, 152 yards, and a laser-beam TD to Randy Moss through tight coverage is a pretty nice coming out party. The doomsayers are going to go crazy this week regarding the Patriots, but I?m going to reserve judgment until I see more of Cassel (assuming they don?t sign Chris Simms or Vinny Testaverde). Once upon a time those same doomsayers lit their torches when Drew Bledsoe went down and got replaced by a little-used, unheralded guy who, like Cassel, didn?t even start in college. That Brady guy turned out all right.

Thumbs Sucking
- To my growing family! I am pleased to announce the birth of my daughter Elizabeth Virginia Risdon born Sept. 8th at 12:34 PM. If she?s anything like her 3-year old brother, she?ll be sucking her thumb in no time. Normally this space is reserved for sarcasm, sadism, and negativity. I?m floating too high for any of that this week; plus, I?m too tired to come up with negative adjectives to describe the play of Ohio State last Saturday.

Jeff.Risdon@RealGM.com
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