$.01--The biggest news in football from the weekend came off the field when the University of Texas parted ways with head coach Mack Brown after a prolonged period of angst and speculation.

The timeline of this story is all over the place. At various points, based on who was speaking at the moment:

- Brown was set to resign his position

- Nick Saban was mulling the move to Austin from Alabama, for a reported $10M per year

- Jim Harbaugh and Mike Tomlin were alleged “interested candidates” despite currently holding NFL jobs

- Brown was safe because the ample Texas boosters weren’t sure what to do

As late as Saturday morning, Brown remained employed amidst a Sharknado of inaccurate reporting, shrewd leveraging, and outright incompetence by the Longhorn administration and boosters. The myopic arrogance of the Longhorn nation, who have no concept of why anyone would think the Texas head coaching job is the best job in America, burned them. I’m not just talking best football job either; these folks vapidly believe the only more prominent position in all of the United States is being governor of Texas.

Yet a few hours later, Brown resigned his coaching position. This came after Saban used them like a redneck uses a spittoon, leveraging the completely unsubstantiated rumors to extract a few more millions from Alabama. It became painfully obvious to everyone that the Texas football program makes Obamacare seem running smoothly by comparison.

Before I moved to Texas, I was only somewhat aware of the UT football craziness. I didn’t really hold an opinion one way or the other about the Longhorns other than respecting the heck out of Colt McCoy. The arrogance and condescension of everything else in the world by Longhorn faithful was immediately obvious, and disgusting. It’s in your face, it’s omnipresent, and it’s ceaseless. The closest parallel I can come up with for people outside the region is that they believe they are China and the rest of the college football landscape is Laos, the Phillipines, and North Korea.

Watch their insulated fantasy world continue as they float every big-name coach in America as possible replacements. Never mind that those will be completely fabricated by megalomaniac Longhorns with enough money to fund a private space program who vainly believe “if they say it, it will come true.” And when the 15th big name shoots them down, after the Jon Grudens and David Shaws and Sean Paytons and Kirby Smarts of the world all laugh at their suitcases of cash, maybe then they will realize that it’s not everyone’s dream to lead what is easily the most delusional fan base and hyper-scrutinized program in the nation.

$.02--The dysfunction in Texas extends north up I-35 from Austin to Dallas, where the Cowboys managed to blow a game as only the Tony Romo-led Dallas Cowboys can do.

How bad was this one? Consider this:

 

The backup QB in question is Matt Flynn of the Packers. Green Bay beat writers were openly calling for his benching at that point, wanting to go back to the flaming sack of quarterbacking incompetence that is Scott Tolzien. Instead of simply running the ball against a leaky Packers defense, Dallas kept throwing the ball. Never mind that they were averaging over seven yards per carry. Never mind that Romo has a lengthy history of throwing games away in December.

Throw it away he did. His first fourth-quarter INT, with just under 3:00 remaining and the Cowboys still ahead 36-31, is the play that will forever live in infamy. On 2nd-and-6, the Packers were not the enemy for Dallas. The clock was the only thing that mattered. Yet the Cowboys called a pass. Romo dodged a quick rush and had a chance to run a little. Remember, the clock is the enemy. Yet he foolishly threw the ball over the middle, and the ball was picked off. Word came out in the postgame presser that Romo checked out of a run play.

Green Bay parlayed that into the go-ahead score, as Flynn fired a strike to James Jones. It was his fourth TD pass of the second half, which says a whole lot more about the Cowboys defense than it does Matt Flynn’s skill. Yet in this game, Flynn was more reliable in the clutch than Tony Romo. The Cowboys QB threw another interception on the ensuing drive, a fantastic catch by Tramon Williams on a bad read and throw by Romo.

I’ve defended Romo in the past, but this loss is on him. Strangely this isn’t even the worst comeback loss on his hands; he blew an even bigger lead in shorter time against Detroit a couple years ago. They also squandered late leads against Denver and Detroit this year thanks to untimely turnovers and horrifyingly inept clock management by Jason Garrett and his coaching staff. If the Cowboys miss the playoffs, losses like these are ample cause for firing Garrett. They are also more than enough evidence that the Cowboys need to at least begin grooming Romo’s successor this offseason.

$.03--Green Bay wasn’t the only team with a monstrous comeback on Sunday. The Tennessee Titans trailed by 17 with less than four minutes to go in the fourth quarter against Arizona and somehow tied the game in regulation. Ryan Fitzpatrick found Michael Preston for a pair of TDs, and the Titans recovered an onside kick when Larry Fitzgerald of all people couldn’t haul it in.

Alas, the fantastic comeback wound up for naught, as the Cardinals prevailed in overtime after Antoine Cason, who had the game of his life, picked off Ryan Fitzpatrick on Tennessee’s first drive in the extra stanza. Arizona drove down and left Nashville a lucky victor when Jay Feely nailed a 41-yard field goal.

To say the win was critical for Arizona is an understatement. They improved to 9-5 to stay within a game of the Wild Card, and they get a shot at one of the teams they are chasing, San Francisco, in Week 17. For all intents and purposes, the win eliminated any chances for any other teams to catch them from behind. They also showed their mettle as a team, winning a tough game on the road.

Poo-poo the Titans all you want, but they are a talented team. Unfortunately they do not always play to that talent, in part because of chronic QB issues. Rumors abound that coach Mike Munchak will be fired at season’s end, but his team played hard for him on Sunday. They lost to a more talented team that needed the win more.

It could be a costly win for Arizona, however, as Fitzgerald suffered a concussion on that aforementioned onside kick. Without him, they are unlikely to win against both Seattle and San Francisco in the final two weeks. The schedule makers did Arizona no favors, but don’t count them out just yet.

$.04--Week 15 kicked off with a surprise on Thursday night, as the San Diego Chargers bolted into Mile High and shocked the Broncos. San Diego was the crisper, more focused and tougher team despite being on the road against the AFC’s presumable No. 1 seed.

It was an impressive display on both sides of the ball by the Chargers. Heck, even punter Mike Scifres had an outstanding night. He punted three times and the Broncos took over at their own six, 11 and 3 after those boots. Philip Rivers was okay, while his receivers were fantastic. So was RB Ryan Mathews, scorching the depleted Denver defense for 124 yards and a touchdown.

Ah yes, the Denver defense. They really miss Kevin Vickerson and Derek Wolfe up front, not to mention Champ Bailey in the back. They’re not a very physical unit. As skilled as Von Miller is, and as well as Danny Trevathan plays in space, the Broncos don’t get off blocks well. When they do, they’re not a punishing group. They struggled to stand up to impressive rookie RT D.J. Fluker and a vastly improved San Diego line. Keenan Allen’s ability to outfight defenders for both his touchdowns proves it’s not just the front.

That’s a very real problem moving forward for Denver. The Bengals and Patriots are both physical teams up front on both sides, and they are the most likely challengers to Denver in the playoffs. The Chargers could be a problem if they make it too, but when Miami beat New England their chances took a big hit.

$.05--I don’t know whether or not Leslie Frazier is going to keep his job as head coach of the Minnesota Vikings, but I know this: what’s left of his team continues to play very hard for the embattled coach.

The Vikings stunned the visiting Eagles 48-30 despite missing several key pieces. Most notable is Adrian Peterson, the reigning MVP. Also out was his backup, the competent Toby Gerhart. Both starting tight end Kyle Rudolph and backup John Carlson missed the game. Corners Chris Cook and Xavier Rhodes, who sit atop the depth charts at Ourlads.com, were both inactive. Top safety Harrison Smith returned from an injury but didn’t play a lot.

It would have been very easy for the Vikings to mail in this one. After all, the Eagles came in at 8-5 with a high-flying offense and the NFC East lead to play for. It certainly seemed as if the Eagles themselves expected the Vikings to be nothing more than a speed bump. To (mis)quote Ronald Reagan, “They counted on the Vikings to be passive. They counted wrong.”

The thing with Minnesota is, someone is going to pay for Josh Freeman. The team committed $3M to the ex-Bucs QB in early October. He started one game and was noticeably worse than either Christian Ponder or Matt Cassel, and he hasn’t been seen since. Depending on who has your ear at the moment, that is the fault of GM Rick Speilman or Frazier and his offensive staff. Owners don’t like setting millions of dollars on fire, which is what Zygi Wilf has done in paying Freeman. Consider this Washington Post piece about Wilf’s sketchy finances.

The easier answer is to can Frazier, whom is beloved by the players but is far from a tactical or motivational expert. The better answer might be to end Speilman’s star-crossed tenure. He added three first-round picks to a returning playoff team, and although Cordarrelle Patterson looks incredibly promising, the team has fallen off a cliff to 4-9-1. Speilman’s inability to solve the perennial QB issues could, and probably should, be his downfall. Of course a new GM would be inclined to bring in his own coach, so either way it doesn’t look good for Frazier. He’s a good coach who will land as a defensive coordinator right away.

$.06--Here’s a little peek into the writing process. It’s currently Sunday evening at around 9:30 PM ET and I’m watching the Steelers absolutely destroy the Bengals. It’s 21-0, the Cincy offense is flat, the Pittsburgh offense is unstoppable, and Cincinnati needs a new punter after Kevin Huber had his jaw broken on a clean hit. Andy Dalton looks off his game, and the Pittsburgh defense is doing a great job anticipating plays.

So I’m going to bed at halftime. I have to cover Monday Night Football for Bleacher Report and will be up all night into Tuesday morning, so I’m going to stock up on sleep. I will hit the cold other side of the pillow with supreme confidence that Pittsburgh is going to win this game. In fact, as I typed this very paragraph they scored again to go up 24-0.

Okay, it’s now halftime. The Bengals have shown a little bit of a pulse but it’s still 27-7 and I’m off to the theater of dreams. I’ll pick this up in the morning…

It’s now 6:26 AM and I just sat down with my first cup of coffee (black, of course). I see the Bengals mounted a slight comeback in the second half but came up short 30-20. Cue the narratives about the same old Bengals, wilting in the national spotlight and unable to play with big boys Baltimore and Pittsburgh. Cincinnati had a chance to move into position to secure a top two seed in the AFC and earn a first-round bye with both New England and Denver losing. Instead they fell tenuously into the third spot, with Indianapolis now having a chance to pass them for that spot.

I’m not sure which spot would be worse for the Bengals. If the Ravens hold onto the sixth seed, the third seed plays them and that’s obviously not good for Marvin Lewis & Co. But the fourth seed will mean the top Wild Card, which will either be Kansas City or Denver. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, better stop and put on a kind face, as Mick Jagger would say.

$.07--Florida State QB Jameis Winston won the Heisman Trophy on Saturday. The redshirt freshman becomes the youngest winner in history, not yet even 20. He won fairly comfortably despite being left off of over 100 ballots altogether. His winning margin was the seventh-largest in history.

That is a testament to just how much better Winston was than anyone else in college football. Had it not been for his overpublicized legal issue, it’s a certainty he would have received every first-place ballot outside of SEC sycophants. But his brush with the law--he was not charged after an investigation into an alleged sexual assault--cost him a wider margin.

Thankfully it didn’t cost him the award. I cannot recall a more impressive, clearly superior performance over the course of a college football season since another Seminole QB, Charlie Ward in 1993. Runner-up A.J. McCarron wouldn’t have been in the top 15 of voting if he didn’t play for Alabama, as his was a career achievement vote for guiding the best program in the country.

Here is what my final ballot would have looked like if I had one:

1. Jameis Winston, QB, Florida State

2. Jordan Lynch, QB, Northern Illinois

3. Andre Williams, RB, Boston College

4. Johnny Manziel, QB, Texas A&M

5. Bryce Petty, QB, Baylor

Also, I was glad to see a lot of folks acknowledge just how special Archie Griffin truly was. He remains the only two-time Heisman winner after Manziel failed to repeat. I’ve been fortunate enough to meet Archie Griffin several times and he remains a class act, humble and approachable.

$.08--NFL Quickies

1. Here’s a way to win a bet against a football know-it-all. Ask them to list players with double-digit sacks this year. Unless he/she is from Tennessee, or reading this column, most folks will never get one of the names. That would be Titans DT Jurrell Casey, a 2011 third round pick from USC. He’s barely six feet tall but has relentless energy and quickness, and it has translated to the NFL. Take note, Aaron Donald critics…

2. Matt Asiata. Kudos to you if you had the onions to pick him up in fantasy football. He had three career carries in three years prior to Minnesota’s game against Philadelphia. Against the Eagles he scored three touchdowns. Tip of the hat to Phil Loadholt and the Vikings offensive line, too.

3. There have been two shutouts in the NFL this year. Both times the team failing to score a point was the New York Giants. Eli Manning threw five INTs to make sure they didn’t scratch the Seattle end zone. I’d give Eli some credit in that one of the INTs was a Hail Mary at the end of the first half, but once you’ve thrown four, the fifth doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things.

4. Dez Bryant leaving the field with over a minute left in the DAL/GB game is indefensible. So is Tom Brady’s truculent, profane quipping after New England’s loss. The NFL likes to hold itself up as a pillar of sportsmanship, but two of its more prominent players acted like eight-year old losers. Way to be role models, gents…

5. Once again the New Orleans Saints got beat up on the road in the NFC West. As much as Drew Brees wants to deny it, his Saints are quite obviously a vastly inferior team on the road. They will not win a road playoff game unless things change dramatically. Also from that game, Robert Quinn for Defensive Player of the Year?

6. Bonus one for this week, but he deserves it: Robert Mathis passed longtime teammate Dwight Freeney for most career sacks in Colts history. That’s an amazing accomplishment, getting 108 sacks in one uniform while lining up across from a Hall of Fame-caliber player for most of his career. Congrats, Mr. Mathis!

7. Second bonus, because I feel obligated to mention the train wreck that is the Washington Ethnic Slurs, who lost to 3-10 Atlanta when a 2-pt. conversion failed. I like the decision to go for the win. It might be Mike Shanahan’s only good decision of the last two months of his Washington coaching career. What a mess.

$.09--College/Draft quickies

Because this is the first question most people ask me when I talk about a prospect, here are some relatable player comparisons for some of the notable young men who will be drafted in May. By no means are they perfect, but for a skinny description they (mostly) work. This edition has a decided West Coast bias.

Derek Carr, QB, Fresno State--Matthew Stafford’s oft-lazy mechanics without quite the same arm talent

Trent Murphy, OLB/DE, Stanford--a slightly quicker Cliff Avril with a lesser bull rush

Ifo Ekpre-Olomu, CB, Oregon--Leon Hall with healthy legs, maybe a little better in space

Austin Seferian-Jenkins, TE, Washington--at his best, he’s what Brandon Pettigrew is for the Lions right now

De’Anthony Thomas, OW, Oregon--a more decisive Dexter McCluster with a little more lower body strength

Shayne Skov, LB, Stanford--Brian Cushing with less excessive testosterone rage, but not a lot less

And two for the East Coast…

Tajh Boyd, QB, Clemson--a smaller, less mechanically sound Troy Smith with a bigger arm

A.J. Johnson, LB, Tennessee--the later version of Jonathan Vilma’s post-Jets career

$.10--It’s Christmas season. If you’re reading this and haven’t yet finished your shopping, get out and wrap it up as soon as you can. Be thoughtful. Have a plan before you shop. There is nothing worse than the stereotypical 40-something man wandering aimlessly around a mall. Your wife or girlfriend doesn’t want a sports-logo Snuggie, or a remote-controlled helicopter, or cheese as a gift. Think about her favorite TV shows and use them as a template if needed. If you’re stuck for ideas, ask her friends. They’ll help you, trust me. If you don’t know any of her friends, no Christmas gift you can buy is going to help.

Ladies, I know there is temptation to try too hard. No man wants to smell like Axe, or even Tim McGraw, who apparently has his own cologne. We don’t want cream-colored cable-knit sweaters or electric wine openers, though those spatulas that emblaze logos on meat look pretty cool.

Enjoy the holidays and try and facilitate that enjoyment for others as well. I’m not suggesting breaking into spontaneous carols while in line for 35 minutes at the local Target, as I was Friday night. Instead, be polite to the bleary-eyed clerks. If you are able-bodied, leave the better parking spots for those who aren’t able to run a 5K. Let the idiot make the left turn out of a crowded parking lot. Smile at strangers, especially the children.